These were some great posts to extend the new guys back in the day...I think it was circa 2007 or so. bobbythekidd (a legend) on AGS compiled this listing off of an old welcome aboard thread. Enjoy and if you feel like it make a new post and maybe we start an updated list that works along the lines of the humor shared amongst the fans in this one.
From the thread welcoming mountain_man.
1. Montana doesn't like Montana State
2. San Diego is overrated
3. NDSU should be #1 and got jobbed not being in the playoffs, in the minds of most
posters not from NDSU
4. A player from Cal-Poly will win the Buchanan
5a.You left off the fact that you are considered a Homer is you think your team has a shot
at winning a game!
5b. The SoCon "is weak", and if you pick anyone other than App. St., Furman, and
Wofford, to finish in the top 3 you are absolutely crazy!
6. You'll love it when AZGrizFan posts anything since he has the best avatar on the
7. Don't get involved in the GSU/BVG debate. No matter what you post, a GSU fan will
promptly tell you your an idiot and lack the necessary information.
8. It'll take a while, but you will come to understand every word from Mr. Chicken.
9. San Diego would've beat Ohio State this year.
10. App State is "over-rated"
11. Use the correct terminology when referring to FCS. Ralph knows where you live.
12. Refer all sexual/moral questions to Cap'n Cat in the lounge, he's our AGS resident
13. Don't ever post in Crapsville before the season is officially over for ASU. If you've
won the NC, don't post still because you'll jinx it for next year.
14. CatfishCCU is of unknown sexual orientation and very well might also be known as
15. The Furman posters on this board are generally pretty cool, do not confuse them with
their purple companions on the UFFP.
16. Don't talk too much smack about WCU...their diehards are already probably
contemplating suicide as it is.
17. We'll never live down "hot, hot, hot." Before every big game, expect our opposing
team to bring it up like nobody has ever seen if before. Yes, we've explained that it wasn't
meant for release or to be a recruitment video. No, they don't listen.
18. Montana cannot lose at Wa-Griz, and don't let anybody tell you otherwise.
19. Don't get in the middle of a D1B/Cap'n Cat/UNH Wildcats vs. Baldy/AZGrizFan
political battle unless you have approximately 36-48 continuous hours available to argue
over pointless details.
20. If a team starts unexpectedly having a great season, expect their posters to multiply
1000x over (*ahem* San Diego).
21. Please don't criticize another poster for their lack of spelling. Sometimes you just
want to get you point across, not turn in a freakin' spellproofed essay.
22. Cap'n Cat bribes the girls in his pictures to appear with him, don't let him tell you
23. Anybody on here with over 3,000 posts officially has no life (I'm getting close, I
24. IGO4UNI is ALWAYS drinking, feel no obligation to crack one open just to post on
his drinking threads, another opportunity shall come usually within 12-14 hours.
25. Don't tell Cap'n Cat you live near some good fishing spots unless your sure you're
cool with a HUGE dude crashing on your couch for a few days/months.
26. Don't be afraid to introduce yourself to fellow AGS'ers at a tailgate. Although perhaps
somewhat awkward at first, we're all usually hammered anyway.
27. App fans are despicable, vile pieces of trash to all opposing teams' fans following
their visit and loss at KBS. Accept this as the price of success.
28. Dave Coulson is a through-and-through App homer. Don't let his extensive
knowledge of all FCS teams and usually correct predictions fool you.
29. D1B did NOT in fact play for Liberty University as he is actually the anti-Christ.
30. Thou shalt be liked more around AGS if you change your avatar to a pic of a smokin'
31. Prognosticating and arguing about who's gonna win on AGS is to many more fun
than the actual game.
32. If thou talketh smack and thou team loseth, taketh not a few weeks off AGS in hopes
that we'll forget. Cometh back over and eat thou crow. We have long memories, anyway.
33. Honestly, the east-coast-bias thing is just stupid.
34. Thou shalt not post naked pictures on the bikini thread.
35. Arguing about whether or not is colder in one FCS city versus another and what sort
of advantage that gives is stupid, do not partake.
36. If an AGS fans' team is losing, chances are great it's the fault of the playcalling and
coaching. If they ran the team, things would be going a lot better.
37)Great West is best.....if only this year.....and if counting only non-play-off wins
38) Bison95 is married and therefore hasn't had sex in a long time...he requires that he
lives vicariously through you.
39) UNHWildCats has a thing for Asians...
40) Mods are your freinds here....respect them
41) Any pictures of hot women that you come across or hilarious videos you are
OBLIGATED to post them here...
42) Once again, CatfishCCU's sexual orientation is heterosexual and Sticky Bunz is just a
43) Every FCS conference has the worst referees in the world!
44) If you have a teen age daughter, do not take her anywhere near a Northern Iowa
45) If have a teenage asian son, don't take him anywhere near a New Hampshire game
46) If you think you know everything, you must be a Delaware fan
47) Don't be too impressed when it looks like Delaware fans always monopolize the top
ten of any contest held by or sponsored by AGS. 90% of all AGS members are Delaware
Fans. Also as bad as UD has been over the last few years, they have plenty of time to
48) Contrary to any denials you have heard in this or other threads, Catfish CCU and
AppGuy04 are the same person. However, AppGuy is really straight
49) Contrary to any denials you have heard in this or other threads, billk and gannonfan
are the same person
50) I am, and you will be too, amazed at all the absolutely useless information known by
51. The BSC is overrated---especially according to Hens fans.
52. Ralph is your friend and helper.
53. Win or lose, Georgia Southern Sucks
54. citdog is a very well adjusted young man. He is also a stark raving, one might say
RABID Secessionist! He and his Cadets are responsible for more dabauchery than the
Barbary Pirates! Ralph is also your friend and helper!
55. citdog pokes horses
56. only if they let me buy them dinner first! (refer to #55)